Velociman is back and he has some things to say about women in the workplace, it’s some of the best words that I’ve read or heard. I wish to hell I could post this at work. At least give it to my managers.
First I disagree with this statement in part:
I had a theory, once : women think there are only a few jobs that The Man is going to allow females to take, and then only for quota’s sake. And that may be true. It is, in fact, most certainly true.The jobs are there, they are available, women are in those jobs and it’s not always because of quota filling requirements. It’s because they can do the damn job.
This is where he hits it dead on:
Well, let me tell you two things: Number One: there are only a few jobs cracker-assed motherfuckers like me can get, too. I’m no corporate officer, although I play one in the shower. Number Two: remember the two women I said DID have Senior Management jobs? Remember what I said their work ethic was? Do The Job. Show Respect to Your Coworkers. And for God’s sake shut the fuck up about how it’s too hot or too cold in here! Step away from the thermostat, bitch! You should have sweat burning your eyeballs before you EVER EVER admit to a man that it’s 1.5% degrees Fahrenheit off your optimal comfy zone. Don’t you get it? Nobody wants to hear that shit. Shut The Fuck Up!Did you catch that important part: Work Ethics, DO THE JOB
The temperature thing is a little far out, but this isn’t:
I’ve worked with 100′s of women over the years. Women are always whining at work about childcare issues and they don’t know how they are going to continue to keep juggling work and kids. This is one of my damn pet peeves and if you can’t even juggle safety, security and someone to watch over your kids…you sure the hell aren’t going to do a damn good job for 8 hours in a work place. Quit the damn whining and take care of it. Quit having your damn kids call you at work at the drop of a hat and to tell you they made it home from school safely…hire a damn babysitter.
Here’s a few other tips mostly for women, but I know a few men who might learn a thing or two:
1. Don’t call in every damn month when your period starts. You know what? Most of us feel miserable, have cramps, bloat etc. Get the fuck over it, expect it…deal with it. No, you are not worse than every other woman who bleeds. If you do show up, no it’s not an excuse to not do a damn thing all day.
2. Leave the showing up late, having to leave early for absolute emergencies. Enrolling your child in school, dental appointment, is not an emergency. Take a vacation day, plan ahead.
3. No I do not want to see the pictures of your children, your sister’s wedding or the color scheme you are redoing your bedroom in. If I wanted to take that kind of time, I would go home and redo my own.
4. Don’t call in sick to work and show up the next day with a new hairdo, manicure and pedicure. C’mon…how stupid do you think we are? How stupid do you think we think YOU are?
5. If you have your work done for the day don’t sit and do your nails, cruise the internet or pull out a magazine. Go help someone who is not done.
6. Stay longer and work harder to get your job done if that is what is required. If it happens alot speak to the proper manager, don’t whine to everyone else who really doesn’t give a shit and will tell your manager. Besides you are not working when you are whining.
7. If someone asks you a question you should know the answer to..don’t bullshit your way through it. Say you don’t know, but you will find out. For God’s sake go find out and deliver the answer.
8. If you want to be treated like a professional at work, then dress and act like one. If you want to be treated as a hooker…then keep letting those boobs fall out and keep on wearing those red spiked shoes, and yes that black bra looks lovely under that white see through blouse. Hello.
9. You are not there to make friends. Leave your personal life – all aspects – at home. No one cares who you are fucking, if your husband is an ass, your mother-in-law is a queen bitch or bill collectors kept you up all night. To quote Velociman “Shut The Fuck Up”.
And last but not least…and the most important:
10. Do not bullshit, coddle or patronize your boss, employee or anyone in the workplace. If he/she asks your opinion on something in the work place about the workplace, give it to him/her straight. Even if it hurts. No one can stand or respect a suck up or someone who is wishy washy. Always be honest, sincere and respectful. Then you are never back peddling or apologizing. If you don’t know who you are and what you believe…don’t expect anyone to notice you.
Then again we work with too damn many people who don’t give a shit about what kind of job they do. They are just there to put in 8 hours on a good day, and collect a paycheck. There is no help for them…men or women. They just need their asses fired. Funny how they never can quite figure out why they are being picked on. I guess the boss is just an ass. Hopefully for them US Clueless is hiring.